Ebony, ivory and everything in between...I'm feeling a little...disturbed. Read here to see why (and read the comments too): http://afrobella.com/?p=142#comments For those of you too lazy to read it, one of my favourite bloggers posted a piece about interracial relationships. Specifically, she referenced a story about how Will Smith would like to do a romantic comedy with Cameron Diaz, but he thinks that America wouldn't be ready for such a flick. The blogger, Afrobella, asked readers to post their comments and I was really dismayed by what I read. Apparently, according to these readers, they (and America), would most definitely NOT be ready for a film showing black on white love, even if it starred two of America's most bankable film stars. Afrobella mistakenly thought "hey, it's 2007...aren't we there yet?" Reading those comments made me think "no fucking way".
I can't even begin to understand what a lot of Black people in America are going through. With the shadow of slavery, segregation and the violent civil movement still on the country, from what I gather, things seem to be pretty rough. But at whose hand? In a struggle, there is usually an offensive and a defensive. In the past, Whites have been the aggressor while Blacks have been forced to submit. At the late end of the 20th century, I believe, the roles had been reversed. I understand that Black people were/are angry (and with excellent reason), but wow, there seems to be so much vile spitting out of the mouths of my supposed brothers and sisters that it's just making me sick. God, where do I start? Let me try...
All that shit in rap "music" about niggas, hos, ballers, bitches...While I miss music videos, I'm kind of happy to be away from bitches getting champagne poured on them, bling thrown in the air by shot-callers, and video hos ass slapping on top of cars. I can't watch it. Who are these people? How have they become role models for Blacks? How is it that this language has seeped into everyday life like a foul smelling stream? Hip hop, I used to love her...
Black-on-Black hatin'...Speaking from personal experience, Black people dissing other Blacks for not being black enough is just plain old effed up. For example, I read about some Blacks not willing to support Barack Obama because he's a biracial immigrant, and doesn't understand what it's like to be Black in America. Wow, talk about shooting one's self in the foot. Here's a man who is tapped to be President and he doesn't get love from some narrow-minded folks because he's not Black enough!!! I've been dissed for being white-washed/brain-washed/a race traitor for not speaking in ebonics, hanging out and dating Whites and not acting the fool. Even my dear moms tends to remind me by saying "you're not white, you know." What is that? Is it fear, disgust, suspicion? I don't know but I think it does nothing but keep minds close and limit potential.
And that leads me to my last point. By being racist (some would say supporting our own), life and viewpoints are limited. My feeling on this is a bit complex, so let me try to explain it and give an example. Essence magazine, which I happen to pick up from time to time, is a Black magazine that covers issues found in all those mainstream magazines. Recently, they decided to celebrate "Black love" by inviting (Black) men to propose to their (Black) girlfriends through the magazine. Readers could then vote on their favourite couple and send them on an all-expense paid honeymoon in South Africa. While I find it encouraging to see Black couples in love and making the committment of marriage, especially seeing so many discouraging Black relationships portrayed in the media and in real life, I find it sad that all genuine love isn't usually celebrated in mainstream media (I can only thing of O(prah) magazine as the only consistently colour-blind publication). I understand that Essence is a Black magazine but I couldn't help but think why not celebrate love period? Am I too naive?
Living in Japan, and before that, Montreal, such matters are not part of my day-to-day. Inter-racial couples are de rigeur here, particularly between Whites and Japanese. I have friends who are or who have found love outside their race. All I can say that loving someone, anyone, is hard work and being there, no matter with whom it's with, should be celebrated, not questioned or looked down on. To those haters, all I can say is feel the love, no matter what colour it is...
***Please don't misconstrue what I've written as a rant against Black folks. Just needed to get somethings off my chest. Also, I know this has nothing to do with life in Japan and I'll get back to that soon.
3 comments:
i wish i could say i was surprised, but...
hey, I am a bit surprised that you say that interracial couples are de rigueur in Japan. I noticed many Japanese and whites, but I heard many a tale of troubling relationships and torn families because of that.
I would say that Japan is no more and no less racist in this regard as the West. However, in the West we see inter-racial couples more often, simply because, there are more of every "race" here.
cool pic BTW
dan
Hey there woman!
Oh, you just know how to get me started... I skimmed through the comments on Afrobella's blog, and I feel as though the comments were pretty oriented towards the screen, with little to no tranposition to 'real life'. So the beef didn't seem to be so much with interracial relationships (although some mentionned it) as it was to African American actresses getting screentime. And maybe, too, the lack of portrayal of happy brown couples (why do the happy couples have to have a white member to them, and what is this trying to tell us, etc, etc.)
One good thing that would, in my opinion (unless Will's role will be a departure from his usual softy ones) come from this on-screen romance would be the possible dissolution of black man / white woman relationship portrayals that lead to papers like this one: http://brownfemipower.com/?p=719 (i was just dying to plug that one in there, i practically puked when I read it.)
As for the real life factor - honey people will hate on anything good which they don't have regardless of whether it falls in line with their politics or not. Any common denominator will do to pick at - refer to my 'no good to the brotherhood' post. I'm speaking from an odd perspective, being a product of an interracial relationship 'anyways', so in a sense I know nothing else. But I guess it's human instinct to wish to 'stick to your own'[and see everyone doing the same], even though 'survival' is no longer what's at stake.
[five minute introspection pause ensues]
Can I start at the issue of identity? Regardless what colour, class or religion, I think we all struggle with it in our own way. And perhaps to some, the partner [and the partners chosen by our families and [some] friends, who are extensions of our identities as we are extensions of theirs] is a validating agent, family and friendship often being the primary element of one's affiliations. [and somehow, what goes into your gene pool -or who your brother chooses to sleep with-is to some meant to affect your identity in some way. go figure.] Partners allow us to reinforce who we are at a certain time / helping us get there. In the words of miss Jolie "I tend to be attracted to my next level of growth".
Generations past come from a history of colonialism, slavery, you name the opression someone we know has issues with it. Although we're one generation further from that, we still carry it in our baggage [or we're fooling ourselves into thinking we're not - which also makes it part of our identity]. Having a family gathering where everyone is the same colour / blesse a meal the same way, to some, is essential to the idea of family and unity, because with skin tone and religion comes unwritten, easily pinpointed commonalities. It's a backwards way of thinking, but god knows, it keeps things simple. No questions need be asked, to others and to oneself.
Thankfully, love was not meant to be simple to begin with, and questioning oneself actually leads to growth.
[update: I am not yet Muslim ;)]
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